The REAL Canterlot Wedding

What you're about to read is top secret information on what the real Canterlot Wedding was like, unlike what you have seen on TV. This is how it REALLY happened, as the episode was only a "cover-up" to hide the truth. Where really this is known as.

====The Equestrian Combination Incident====

Dateline: 18-4-1004

We find our ponies codenamed: Book Worm, Crab Apple, Pink Pie, Rareware Software, Dashing, and Fluttershy (we couldn't find a real code name for her so just pretend it's one).

Book Worm is reading a message she got lodged inside what looked like a sandwich. This was however before we secretly replaced the sandwich with A DJ booth. (This swap remained unnoticed throughout the entire movie, in which it was intended to be one). The message found was a ransom note as both Princess Celestia and her sister (who does not appear in this episode). The shock was that this was a message from Book Worm's long lost brother, being someone she never knew she was related too. In shock and peril the ponies gathered their loot from the dragon Fluttershy had just slain and headed off by hoof to Canterlot.

It is at this point they start to play an intermission with Octavia and Vinyl Scratch. In which there seems to be chanting from ponies wearing red ghost hoods. We couldn't get much of this recorded cause we were filming in uncharted territory. But all we know is Octavia and Vinyl made it out okay and even made out for no reason. They weren't even ever romantically interested in one another.

We cut back to the ponies, as Pink Pie decides it's a good time to break the 4th wall. She will grab a map of Equestria and fold it a bunch of times to make a shortcut to the castle. It works but a whole town that's no long on the map was destroyed and 500 lives were lost because of Pink Pie. Tho there were two survivors we keep under custody. They claim to be one another yelling their names at each other "Lyra" "Heartstrings" "Lyra" "Heartstrings" "Lyra" "Heartstrings".

The ponies do get to the castle in no time however, tho Crab Apple question of why didn't the ponies take the train was cut short as it went into a commercial break showing you shots from the ending, spoiling everything. But don't worry it's still a secret in this documentation that you just happen to be reading. I mean we will not tell you that Big Macintosh actually despises Fluttershy or anything. Cause really we found a code name for her... Natasha.

After the commercial break we cut to Apple Crab and Pink Pie enjoying a nice spaghetti dinner, the two kiss for no apparent reason what so ever. We do know that the two ponies will stay closer together till the end of the episode. You only will enjoy this moment cause there's a hidden threat that a certain walled-eye pony would get it. Get it?

We are back to stalling as we more background pony stuff happening. It's mainly composed of the spa ponies finding treasure in a mud bath. As it turns out the mud bath leads to an ancient city. Doctor Whooves discovers there use to be a King of Equestria as well as a Queen, somehow. And Nurse Redheart must find a cure to save the life of twenty ponies at once all by herself. Nothing interesting at all actaully.

After the little random dinner date; Apple Crab, Pink Pie, and Rareware Software form a team and storm the castle. While Fluttershy (to end confusion we stuck to Fluttershy) and Dashing went off for an aerial assault. Leaving Book Worm to wonder who formed this plan and why. But as it turns out vampire ponies have been inside the castle, and Firebrands were flying over the castle.

Canterlot was inhabited as all the ponies could of been killed by the hordes of various hostiles. This was all the work of the Captain of the guards, Stainless Steel. Yes the original name of Book Worm's brother.

Book Worm charged in taking down anything in her way (including Rareware Software who was pushed off out a window and is now MIA). (if you do ever find this missing pony call us at out hotline number 517-2352IFOUNDAPONY.com). Even tho we're seeing the ponies putting up a good brawl, they get defeated but not ended. All with exception of Book Worm, who is confronting her brother. The two stare each other off until we get a commercial break.

This commercial break like the last shows the ending of the episode, again spoiling everything. Including everything in your refrigerator (this is why we call them spoilers).

Back to the show we see Celestia in a cage in which she cannot break out of, cause it's magic proof and such. Book Worm did the only thing she could do, blast her brothers face off, not letting him talk a thing about anything. Book Worm started to cry about this as Canterlot is now deserted and she had murdered the one responsible in cold blood. But then she came into the light. The one shown in the spoilers.

It's everyone's favorite pony we all know and love to save the day, it's Princess Cadance. She frees Celesetia and leaves Book Worm something. A picture of her and her brother much younger, only making Book Worm much sadder. Celestia comforts her, as they are the last two alive in Canterlot.

The reason you never saw this episode was simple enough, Pink Pie's eye's were red. That is all

END.